Cuddles and Comforts

I apologize for not posting before now, but yesterday was filled with simply trying to comfort my sweet baby girl...she couldn't be held and she will not suck a paci...it was heart breaking to watch.

Yesterday was a BIG DAY, they extibated her (took her off the vent) early in the morning, it was before the shift change at 7am. We were super thrilled to get that report in a phone call that we received from her nurse. She was doing well, retracting a little and on 6 liters of oxygen running thru her canula, but she was tolerating it pretty well.

When we got there about 8:30am she was crying, but the thing I wasn't prepared for was the fact that I could see her mouth wide open and tears coming out of her eyes but we couldn't hear it at all. Apparently its because the ventilator held her vocal chords open and with her having been ventilated for 5 days, it will take time for sounds to be made...I WAS.NOT prepared for that, it was HEART BREAKING! Several times throughout the day I just wanted to burst into tears because she was so uncomfortable. They took her off the morphine pump in order for her to be alert enough to breath on her own, she only got one dose of Tylenol with codine all day long, so I know she was not feeling well on top of the fact that they weren't doing any feeds in case they ended up having to sedate her again and re-intibate, which they did not!! Praise the Lord!!

A lot of her tubes were out, namely the chest tube and vent were gone, so I was wondering when my aching arms could hold my sweet girl again, after all it had been 5 days...I kept asking, and the answer kept changing: "maybe at lunch", "maybe this afternoon", "maybe after her feed", "maybe after she's rested"....AAAAAHHHHHH!!! Come on, I wanted to hold my baby!! So I finally just sat on the edge of her bed, determined that I wasn't gonna move (she would have to reach around me and over me to get to Ava Jane)...and finally I just got a little bit adament and asked again, "can I hold her now?" And she finally said a hesitant "ok". YES!!

Holding her was such a treat...I love this baby girl, she is a doll baby and I am so thankful for how the Lord has strengthened her and begun the healing process.

This morning she was moved to PICU (Pediatric ICU)and throughout the day they have slowly been removing more tubes and equipment! She's now off of all her pumps, except one (with her Heparin meds), she's down to 21% oxygen and at 4 liters which is great, her stats have been good too, her lungs sound mostly clear, which is good...she's still seeing a Respitory Therapist to break up the secretions every 4 hours and she'll see an OT everyday at noon until her feeds get better. She CAN.NOT.STAND a bottle or a paci, so they did let me try to nurse her and she latched on immediately, but was only able to nurse for about 6 minutes and then she got real tuckered out, which is to be expected, but please pray that she can nurse increasingly more because she has to be supplemented through her NG tube, and we have to improve our feeds and actually gain weight in order to leave the hospital...So, that's the big prayer request now.

Here's a picture of our most precious patient! We've been enjoying our cuddle time this afternoon, we both fell asleep for a bit in the rocker together...it warms my heart to have her near me! Oh how I love this baby!